Easy Sleazy Pecan Pie

This is the best pecan pie I’ve ever had and it’s easy as heck. I’m not biased, you’re biased.

quickie

• Toast the pecans.
• Prebake the crust.
• Make the filling goop.
• Throw it all in the shell and bake.
• Wait till it cools. This part is a sumbitch.

Serves:

• It serves 1-8 depending on how much of a mess you are.

Nutritional information: 

• Go for a jog after. You’ll be alright.

Grocery List:

• 1 single pie crust (homemade or store-bought both work)
• 2 cups pecans
• ¾ cup plus 2 tbsp golden corn syrup (light or dark will also work)
• 2 tbsp maple syrup
• ½ cup brown sugar
• ⅓ cup butter
• 3 eggs
• 1½ tbsp bourbon
• 1½ tsp vanilla
• ¼ tsp salt

LESS quickie

Process:

Preheat the oven to 300 F. Place the pecans in a single layer on a baking sheet and roast for 20-22 minutes, giving them a flip halfway through.

Separate about half the pecans onto a cutting board and give them a rough chop. A smarter person would have taken a pic of the chopped nuts (🖕) but picture chopping each pecan into eighths or so.

Turn the oven up to 400 F. Bake the empty pie shell for 10 minutes, then remove from the oven and let it cool. Turn the oven down to 375 F.

FILLING GOOP: In a medium saucepan heat the corn syrup, maple syrup and sugar on medium heat until it is at a gentle boil. Let it just barely boil for 3 minutes while watching it carefully and giving it the odd stir, then remove the pan from the heat.

After the mixture has cooled for 2 minutes add the butter and let it melt, then whisk until incorporated. Let it cool for another few minutes.

Beat the eggs with the vanilla, bourbon and salt. Pour the egg mixture into the syrup mixture and mix thoroughly. Now you have filling goop.

ASSEMBLY: Put the whole pecans into a bowl and spoon about 2 tbsp of the filling goop overtop. Mix until the pecans are lightly coated, and set aside.

Add the chopped pecans to the rest of the filling goop, and give it a good mix. Pour this mixture into the pie shell. Layer the whole pecans on top in a pattern of your choosing. Choose wisely lest you be mocked by your peers.

Bake the pie for 40-50 minutes at 375 F, until the top is lightly browning. Remove it from the oven and give a very light sprinkle of coarse kosher salt over the top. Cool completely before serving (on a wire rack for a few hours or in the fridge for at least an hour).

Slice it up and get nasty.