Veggie Burgers
Throw this on an onion bun with some classic burger toppings, and you won't be able to tell it's not a real dead cow burger! Unless of course you have a tongue, or eyes. But even if you have one eye, or half a tongue, you know that veggie burgers shouldn’t replicate meat.. and this is a damned good sandwich.
quickie
• Roast the beans
• Toast the walnuts
• Saute all the veg
• Smash it all together and fry 'em up
• Watch a vine compilation and celebrate a simpler time
Serves:
• Makes 6-8 burgers.
Level of difficulty:
• 4/10. It's easy to put everything together, a bit of skill involved with flipping em and keeping the patties from crumbling like your childhood dreams.
Nutritional information:
• Pretty healthy, and they work for a murderless Monday meal. You could probably veganify them too, but you'd have to ask someone smarter than me how to sub the eggs and cheese and have them not be truly awful.
Serves well with:
• Buns, dumdum.
• Sweet potato fries.
Grocery List:
• 2-3 portobellos - around 3 cups once chopped into small chunks. Cremini work too.
• 1.5 cup black beans, drained and rinsed
• 1/2 cup chopped walnuts
• 1/2 cup corn
• Medium red onion, thinly sliced
• 5-6 garlic cloves, crushed
• 1 tsp smoked paprika
• 1 tsp chilli powder (I prefer ancho or chipotle but any will work)
• 3/4 tsp coarse kosher salt (if using table salt use a bit less)
• 1/2 tsp onion powder
• 1/2 tsp black pepper
• 2 tbsp Worcestershire
• 1/4 cup of your favourite BBQ sauce
• 3 large eggs, beaten
• Around 1/2 cup grated cheese.. I like extra old cheddar
• 1/2 cup panko bread crumbs
Optional - I usually make these just as listed above, but if you want to mix it up try some of the following:
• Curry powder
• Cayenne or chili flakes
• Toasted seeds
• Dijon for some zip
• Grated ginger
• Liquid smoke
Less quickie
*CLICK FOR HAWT TIPS*
Process:
Drain and rinse the beans. Roast them on a baking sheet or roasting pan at 350F for 15 minutes. This is a trick I first saw used by J. Kenji López-Alt at Serious Eats and it really improves the texture at the end. Lightly mash the beans with a fork, leave some chunks and stop when they're about half mashed. Toss 'em in a large mixing bowl.
Toast the walnuts in a dry pan for 4-5 minutes over medium-low, until they've become more fragrant and are starting to darken at the edges. These need to be watched as they can burn easily. If they burn, go get a bigmac. If not, add 'em to the bowl.
Saute the onion in a bit of oil until it's browning, about 8 minutes. Add the garlic and saute for another 2 minutes, stirring frequently. Throw it in the bowl.
Saute the mushrooms with a splash of oil until most of the moisture is gone and they're starting to brown, about 7-8 minutes. Bowl 'em up.
Corn? Why into the bowl, of course.
Add all the spices, cheese, bread crumbs, BBQ sauce, Worcestershire and eggs, and mix thoroughly with your hands until it looks like cat barf. Get dirty here, make sure there are no spice clumps waiting to blast a hole through someone's tongue.
I like to panfry up a small blob to taste for salt and spice, before forming all the patties.
If you're finding it a pain in the ass to hold together you can add more bread crumbs, or another egg, or toss the whole thing out and go get yourself a bigmac.
Form patties that are no more than 3/4" thick. If you have just enough left over at the end for a tiny burger and you don't go "awww look at that cute lil babyburger!", you are a guaranteed psychopath. Turn yourself in.
Heat a skillet on medium. Pour in a healthy amount of canola oil, as defined by you. Less oil is better for body health, more oil is better for brain health by making better crispier burgers which exercise your pleasure centres. I go brain.
Cook for 3-5 minutes a side, while doing a little pan tilt action every few minutes to spread the oil around. Don't move them until the first side has crisped up a bit, at which point you can give them a half rotation so they crisp evenly. Flip carefully and curse my name when it goes badly. At this point you've shown you're committed and probably haven't thought about getting a bigmac in 6 minutes, and I'm proud of you.
I serve mine on a lightly toasted onion bun with iceberg lettuce, a slice of onion, pickles, mayo, dijon and ketchup. You do you and let me know how ya did it!!!
These also freeze ok, with a layer of waxed or parchment paper between em.
